I never learned to cast that Stone to Flesh
I cut my teeth on Minor Rings of Protection
And I'm not proud of all my stats
On a torn-up sheet, first-level fighter

But every game's like gold piece, full plate, Brazier of Commanding
+5 halberd, Tome of Understanding
We don't care, we're wielding vorpal swords in our dreams
But every gamer's like backstab, rage, true resurrection, time stop
Half-troll monk just beating all the orcs up
Dungeon crawl, we aren't caught up in your Monty Haul

And we'll never be munchkins (munchkins)
It's the story we want
Fight after fight, too much the same
We crave a different kind of game
Let me have some roleplay (roleplay)
That's my kind of D&D
Then maybe I'll roll, I'll roll, I'll roll, I'll roll
Let me live that fantasy

My friends and I - we've cracked the code
We tell our stories and the loot is a bonus
And everyone who knows us knows that we're fine with this
We didn't come to level

But every game's like chainsaws, trenchcoats, silver bullets, werebears
Rotes that turn vampires into lawn chairs
We don't care, we're casting Forces 5 in our dreams
But every gamer's like 6th gen Ventrue learning Thaumaturgy
Ghoul the mayor, Dominate the clergy
Thanks, we'll pass, we aren't caught up in your hack and slash

And we'll never be munchkins (munchkins)
It don't run in our blood
Cause powergaming is for n00bs
So save it for the intertubes
Let me have some roleplay (roleplay)
A little less diablerie
Then maybe I'll roll, I'll roll, I'll roll, I'll roll
Let me live that fantasy

Ooh ooh oh
Ooh ooh oh
Go on and tell me that it's lame
But I'm in love with story games
Ooh ooh oh
Ooh ooh oh
It's the drama of it all
We aren't caught up in your Monty Haul

And we'll never be munchkins (munchkins)
It's the story we want
Fight after fight, too much the same
We crave a different kind of game
Let me have some roleplay (roleplay)
That's my kind of D&D
Then maybe I'll roll, I'll roll, I'll roll, I'll roll
Let me live that fantasy