Look at this Pokésnap Of Bulbasaur taking a nap For a sec, I thought he was dead Til I threw an apple at his head Professor called me one day Gave me a camera and a tank Said I needed to document An island full of fire-breathing pets So many new Pokémon I haven’t played since 151 Don’t think I’ve ever heard of Bouffalant And when the hell did Todd get so hot? I guess I’ll go and explore Too bad this lens can’t zoom in more I can barely see from that far Oh how the hell was that one four stars? Oh come on! Just get closer! Every creature here could murder me in one blow How was any of this sanctioned for a ten-year-old? And now survival is my mantra Don’t die! Don’t die! Around every corner there’s another surprise Like a Slaking looking at me with it’s bedroom eyes This leery ape, I can’t escape it God why? God why? Now I’m starting to see That everything revolves around me I thought it sounded a bit absurd Until I made friends with this bird Hey look! It’s Meganium Let’s get some pics for my instagram I’ll bust out of this creative rut By putting sunglasses on its butt! Professor said it’d be neat If Magikarp and Pidgeot could meet I’d be happy to grant his wish Hey wait! Did I just murder that fish? Oh god, why? I’m a monster! I’m harassing wild animals with fresh fruit Cuz the way they react is just so freakin’ cute Oh no, it’s angry. Now it wants me To die! To die! Who’s the psycho that decided it would be fun Wreaking havoc on the local eco-system? I’m feeling ill cuz I’m the villain Todd why? Todd why? Look at this Pokésnap I bet you’re wondering how I captured that Please don’t ask me how I captured that...