“Hufflepuffs” Parody of “Afro Puffs” by The Lady of Rage New lyrics by Ian Bonds [Hook] I rock rough and stuff with my Hufflepuffs (HEY!) Rock on, wit cha fair self I rock rough and stuff with my Hufflepuffs (HEY!) Rock on, wit cha loyal self [Verse 1] I rock on with myself cause I’m Hufflepuff It's the Hogwarts house still kickin up dust So umm, let me loosen up my house robes And umm, let me drop this near your ear lobes Cause I'mma break it down to the nitty-gritty one time When it comes to the spells I gets busy with mine Don’t mean to boast, I’ve come to roast Every house ghost and wizard from coast to coast Hufflepuffs ain’t the ones to brag, son We’ll help you open up the egg of a dragon We’re the house that's just and loyal, we’re unafraid of toil Bound to foil Crabbe and Goyle and all they plan to spoil Our emblem is the badger, often underestimated We fight to protect, we’re never intimidated You mess with one of us and we’ll test your luck ‘Cause honey badgers just don’t give a Hufflepuff [Hook] [Verse 2] Hittin’ MC's with Expelliarmus This disarming charm will leave ‘em harmless Their jimmie’s we rustle, our magic’s our muscle, Always tryin’ to prove that you can’t knock the Huffle They say that a Hufflepuff will make the best spouse And we’ve never had a dark wizard come from our house We’re cautious smart wizards and we’re down for whatever And we’re better at Herbology than Potions with Sever-us The clever-est, never fuss with things outside our grasp We’re so intelligent…but get all the Bs in the class So we might not be as clever as the others all along We never even brag, well other than this song We don’t need accolades, we always lose with grace There’s no such thing as shame for only getting second place When it comes to wizarding, we’re really quite mellow Rep’ the house in black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow [Hook] [Verse 3] When it comes to the Huffle, we Puffs know what’s subtle Never tell on a wizard if they might be half muggle We’re loyal and trustworthy, we’ll help you in a hurry Never worry, ‘cause surely, we’ll defend you with fury And when it comes to parties? We know what’s kickin’. A Huffle party’s bitchin’ ‘cause we’re right next to the kitchen We’re itchin’ for a good time, we’re known to laugh and sing And like the muggle Spike we always Do the Right Thing We’ll defend to the end Hogwarts friends and bring the peace And help catalogue where to find fantastic beats We’ll finish every fight, but we’re not known to start one Maybe that’s why they say our house is the smart one But we like games too. We’re not all about business Though it’d be really nice if our house was good at Quidditch Whether seeker or keeper, it’s always lots of fun But we’ve got 99 problems and a snitch is one [Hook]X2
The FuMP
2017-07-14
Artist
Insane Ian
Title
Hufflepuffs
A few weeks ago, the Harry Potter series celebrated its 20th Anniversary. Getting sucked in to Facebook culture like I often do, I joined Pottermore to find out what house I belonged to, and quickly discovered that I'm a Hufflepuff, like other FuMPers Carrie Dahlby, Chris Waffle of Megathruster, and Bonnie and Xander of The Library Bards.
As soon as I found out and shared this thought I quickly realized that, while there's a song or two about the house, there's no RAP anthem yet.
Until now.
That's right, I wrote a braggadocious rap song about the least boastful house in all of Hogwarts.
What.
Lyrics and vocals by Insane Ian
Music, mixing and mastering by Bonecage
Parody of "Afro Puffs" by The Lady of Rage
Copy the code below and paste it on your web site, blog, or anywhere you can input HTML to share this song.
