Who is the Doctor? He's just a cranky old guy
Living out by the junk yard, I can't explain why
But he rocks his long locks with a swankier do
Yes he's older than he looks and much crankier too
He resides out of sight where he hides from the world
In a tiny blue box with a whiny young girl
No, it ainít that creepy, Susan is his granddaughter
But I'm not sure what the story is with Polly or Dodo
The blue police box that the duo call home
Is actually a time machine which allows them to roam
Anywhere in time and space, any place, to and from quick
And it's bigger on the inside, kind of like my stomach
The two of them were happy there and everything was cool
Until the day Susan's teachers followed her home from school
They were concerned so of course they had to force their way inside
And now they're both along for the ride
Who is the Doctor? Who is the Doctor? Who is the Doctor? Doctor who? (3 xs)
Who is the Doctor? He's an eccentric old man
With long hair, funny clothes, and a cane in his hand
Traveling the universe with other people coming with him
Like Ian and Barbara and assorted young women
He can take you any place at any point in time
But the TARDISÖ can't exactly stop on a dime
Tell him where you want to go and he'll say "Yes, my dear.
I hear the planet Skaro is nice this time of year."
Alternately maybe you'd prefer to arrive
100,000 years ago to see the Flintstones live
Or perhaps you'd like to see an Aztec sacrifice
Just be careful that you donít get too involved in their rites
He's had all these companions and what no one understands
Is when you tag along with him you take your life in your hands
The Doctor can regenerate so he won't die yet
I'd like to see you try that
What is his name? And why's it such a secret anyway?
And why did he leave his home planet Gallifrey
Why'd he come to Earth? Is he on the lam
In an interstellar witness protection program?
Did his family disown him, did they try to clone him?
Or did they send him back to when the natives might stone him?
And how many licks does it take to get to
The center of the TARDIS?
Who is the Doctor? A renegade Time Lord
Cruising around in a broken down interstellar Ford
The police box originally worked as a disguise
But not so much past about 1965
It's a stolen antique Type 40 that's prone
To go wherever 'cause it kind of has a mind of it's own
Sometimes it appears right where he wants it to
Other times in the middle of a Dalek barbecue
He's made many enemies from foes who have met him
By now I think the whole universe is out to get him
He's traveled far and wide so he's not safe anywhere
You think the Daleks are bad you should meet Robespierre
So who is the Doctor? That's the big question
He's the leading cause of alien indigestion
A man of mystery and that's all we really know
But also he's the star of the show