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Rob Balder Needlessly Noir 
In acknowledgment of legendary singer/songwriter Leonard Cohen's recent induction to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Rob Balder has come up with a style parody of his music. [If you do not know Mr. Cohen's work, we suggest watching the videos for "First We Take Manhattan" and "Everybody Knows" on YouTube.] From the low-key cheesy synth-pop/orchestral track, to the stylistically jarring female vocal chorus, to the maudlin and unfathomable lyrics with vague references to religion, music, sex and violence, to the gravelly, bone-weary, yet overenunciated delivery [as if you called up your diction teacher at 4 am after a bender], Rob hopes he has captured the pure essence of a Leonard Cohen song. If not, well, perhaps the machine gun apostle will sing a contata of lust for your sister's monkey.

Vocals by the lovely Janny Hofer and technical assistance by the lovely Tom Smith.

This song is now available on the following CDs:
2008-03-28 madmanOTL
After watching the video you suggested, I do understand the song much better. Janny sounds great.
2008-03-28 budsharpe
The sequence when "Everybody Knows" is playing is one of my favorites in the film "Pump Up The Volume". This is a very good style parody of Leonard Cohen. Excellent work!
2008-03-28 creede
This is definitely the song Leonard Cohen would have written had he been asked to join the FuMP. Since he wasn't and never will be it's a good thing Rob was here.
2008-03-29 peterfump9
Very well done!
2008-03-31 scarybug
Awesome! Leonard Cohen is the guy Nick Cave is trying to be.
2008-03-31 EMC
sweetness, well played...BALDER!
2008-04-03 darkNES
This is a wonderful track, but I must protest: NOIR IS ALWAYS NECESSARY.
2008-04-04 seamonkey
I must say I find this unnecessarily dark.
However, it IS BALDER-IFIC!! How is it that I'm loving Rob oh so much more each day?
2008-04-12 djseamus
Hmmm...this track seems to be "goth comedy", and it's got to be the most surreal and sophisticated Fump posting I've ever heard....nicely done, Rob and Janey, and expertly engineered Tom! You guys deserve to light up another Marlboro for this!
2008-04-12 Spaff.com
Great pastiche and a cool lyrical work in its own right. In case anyone out there is still wondering: Yes, Rob Balder is more clever than you.
2008-04-25 elokkin
My weeping soul raises its head from the black pit of dispair as the lone beam of hope that is this song raises it for a brief moment of trancendance before it is dashed back into the cruel slog of this mortal coil. And stuff. In other words, an excellent injection of facetiousness into a genre that takes itself way too seriously. A Winnar Is You!
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